Make Your Personality DNA Work for You, Not Against You!

by Nate Truman




“If I try to be like him, who will be like me?”

 Yiddish proverb


Not until I was a parent for many years to three children, did I realize that each of my kids had a preprogrammed personality that was there from the start.  We each come hardwired with our base personality and those traits just slowly grow in each of us over time.  This is your Personality DNA. 


There are plenty of personality tests on line (see links below) and if you take a few, you will start coming up with the same general profile that often is eerily accurate.  Taking a Jung-Myers-Briggs type test will probably be eye opening for most people.  Are you and extrovert, or introvert? Do you like a stable life and work environment, or change and action?  Money in the bank, or live for the moment?   Do you think constantly of other’s feelings, or do others say you are often disconnected and unfeeling?  These tests can show you how you are wired right now.  Not what you think you are, or what you want to be, but what your deep down programming really is.


Some personality types are drawn to look inside themselves, and they love these sorts of exams, and can make distinctions in their lives to improve in most areas of life, or at least become aware of weaknesses in them that they can work on.  Other types see it as some sort of “feel good mumbo jumbo” and don’t even bother to see if they can learn something with a little Q and A.   If that was your first thought, take the test anyway. Trust me; you will get something out of it.


So your action item today is to spend a little time getting to know the real you and take a few tests online.  Find a description of you and email it to a few close friends and see if they agree.  You will know when you are right when they write back “Oh my gosh, do they KNOW you?”  Once you get a good picture of your basic programming, it can lead you to discoveries on how to handle almost all of your previous roadblocks and conflicts in your life.


How come you start projects but don’t finish? Why can’t you spend any money on yourself?  Why are you always saying “yes” when someone asks for help?  All of these types of actions can be traced to your personality and your core beliefs.


So now you know if you are an ESFP or whatever.  What now?  Once you discover your inner motivations for your outer actions, you can start to change those goals that are not in line with your personality type, and start finding new ways to move toward those goals you have been sabotaging subconsciously.


We all admire good traits we see in others, and it’s usually the ones we don’t have.  I admire those with instant recall of names and events, because I do NOT have that ability.  With a few reminders I can often access the same memories, but never instantaneously.  After I realized that this was not my strong suit, I started taking memory courses and learning tricks to improve my memory.  I did improve in some areas with great focus, but I also learned something; don’t go against your Personality DNA in your goals! 

A great lawyer enjoys their job, and the best have entire law libraries in their heads.  Guess what; if you love combat, competition, and have a great memory, then  being a lawyer is a good line of work for you.  But take that same person and put him into a family counseling or teaching position and you have a terrible match. You don’t want me as your lawyer, or your accountant, trust me! 


You need to be in sync with who you are to be truly happy and successful in your life.  There are successful lives and jobs and relationships out there for every personality type.  Don’t spend your life striving to be someone you are not, instead create the future you desire within the boundaries of who you are.  


There are very successful people in every personality type and they did it by moving towards what they were hardwired for, not fighting it.   Review your life goals and make sure they are goals you truly want, and are not goals that the world has told you are worthy.   Rich and famous for many people would be an unhappy life.  It takes a certain personality type to deal with fans and people who want a piece of you or your estate all the time.   Take the time today to review who you are, and revise your goals accordingly.

Once you stop swimming against the current, you will effortlessly move towards your ideal life!

Free on line personality test links
Personality Test
Lots of Personality tests

Why Paying it Forward, Pays Big Dividends!

by Nate Truman

1124721_we_have_a_dealLet us not become weary in doing good,

 for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.

Galatians 6:9 NIV




“What’s in it for me?”  If this is the first question that pops into your head anytime you hear about an opportunity, you need a new question.   We all know people who always want to get their “cut” before you are finished explaining your idea to them.  Do you want to deal with that kind of person, or better yet, do people think of you as “that guy?”

There is nothing wrong with looking at opportunities, both personal and professional, to see if it’s beneficial for you.  However, if anytime a friend asks a favor or someone at work needs a ride in the other direction your first reaction is “how does that benefit me?” it’s time for you to make a change, and enjoy paying it forward.

The concept has been around a long time with the old adage, “do unto others, as you would have them do unto you” but most people add to that statement in their heads that others should do something helpful FIRST before you do.  

The idea was dramatized a few years ago in a movie with the title “Pay it forward” starring Helen Hunt and Kevin Spacey.   A young boy decides he can change the world by paying it forward.  He does three good deeds and he tells those three people that they should do three good deeds for others as repayment.  That one gesture of good will ends up spreading good deeds across the country.

So how does this work for you? Simple. You start first!  Volunteer at your favorite charity.  Ask to do an errand for an elderly person in your life, or take them out to lunch.  Start a program in your Church or school that people have been saying “someone should do something about…”    Help a friend or a friend’s friend move.  Don’t just lend someone your tools, go help.  If someone tells you they are out of work, take their resume, and actually help get them an interview at your company, or make sure it gets to someone you know that can help.  Plan a special dinner for your spouse or a fun secret outing for the family.  Before you know it, you will be getting your investment back two or three fold.   

Here is what will happen after just doing a few “no profit” favors for others in your life.  First, those that you did a favor for will start treating you more nicely.  Who doesn’t like that? Next, they will try and return the favor somehow.   Great!   If you don’t need any help from that person, suggest to them to pay it forward to someone else.  It really is infectious. 

You may be saying to yourself right now that people will just take advantage of you. Yes, some will take your help with out even a thank you.  What’s the worst that can happen in that situation?  Now they owe you a favor.  That sort of person will probably try and avoid you so you don’t ask them to return the favor. Great!  You did a kind act, move on. 

I have been investing in PIF (pay it forward) for some time, and the dividends not only keep growing, they show up in the most amazing ways!   People’s lives are happier and deals that never would have happened get done with a handshake.   I have helped people that are just acquaintances buy or sell big ticket items, get a job, get a pass into a special event, help a mother with a special need kid and many other similar favors with absolutely no interest in any return of the favor.  It makes me feel great, and I find myself wanting to do it again.  Often times just knowing you made a difference in someone’s life is reward enough.

The only problem is, the return on my investment keeps coming back in unexpected ways.  After awhile people know you have the heart to help others, and they start offering to help you.  Opportunities strangely crop up because of a favor you did months or years ago.

For me the best payback is seeing someone who has gone from just hanging on, to becoming alive again and is now helping others in their area of influence.  If you want massive return on your investments in life, pay it forward and watch the magic grow.


By Nate Truman

1091624_success_succeed_business_money_sign“The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt with the heart.”
Helen Keller


Money, power, fame, sex.  Do you want these things?  I don’t believe you do.

You don’t want money or power; you want the security and freedom they allow you in life. 

You don’t want fame or attention from the opposite sex; you want the confidence and pleasure you believe they would bring you.  

So I will grant you all of your desires right now.  With or without money and power, you have the same level of  security that you will be alive tomorrow.  So you have as much security as the rich and powerful.  You have all the freedom you want, as you must choose how to spend your infinite now just like the richest and most powerful persons on the planet.   If anything, money and power rob you of  much of your freedom and time each day.  You are an amazing creation, unlike any other in the universe.  There is no reason for you to not be supremely secure in the understanding that you have a purpose to fulfill, and you have the freedom to pursue it with or without  riches or an exaulted postion.

Fame and beauty are so fleeting they often come and go, and leave the recipients more insecure than they were before.   So instead I give you the understanding that you can decide right this moment to be as confidant as you want to be.  Confidence is a decision.

You can get in touch with your inner beauty and share it with the world.   When she was alive, Mother Theresa in physical terms would not be  considered beautiful, but I dare you to look at photos of her and not see her inner beauty shining out of her eyes!  

In your mind, was Helen Keller cursed or blessed by being born blind, deaf and “dumb?”  She understood that even a silent and dark world was filled with beauty that could not be seen or heard or touched.

You have a connection to the universe inside of your heart.  You must release yourself from striving after goals that, in the end, are no more than dissipating smoke. Then you can begin to identify those needs you truly have for enjoying this gift of life. Only then will you be pursuing  Life’s Ultimate  Goal.


by Nate Truman
win friends and influence people

“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”
Ephesians 4:29 NIV


From before Plato and Socrates, to Dale Carnegie and all the current experts on relationships, people have been trying to figure out how to “make” other people like them, and then be able to influence them. I think we all would agree that life is more enjoyable with good friends to share our lives with. And who wouldn’t enjoy having influence on others when they have a strong desire to have something go their way? Before you wear yourself out learning skills to manipulate others into liking you, I would suggest that you first memorize and then put into practice the above sentence.

I think any “life coach” or motivational speaker of any religion would agree that if you lived out this one idea in your professional and personal life you would have many close friends and have great influence when ever you wanted it.

The first statement is important. “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths,” that is very clear. If you gossip about others at work, and people know that about you, others may think of you as a good source of “dirt” but I doubt they would also want you to be a close and trusted friend. How do you feel about the person who makes the rude, condescending, off color, or racist remark, or is known for always putting a curse word into every sentence? For whatever reason people do this, it’s not to win friends. It’s to put others down, and try and build themselves up. To win friends and influence people you would do well to live by choosing your words carefully and work to “rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips.” Colossians 3:8

Secondly we are urged to speak “…only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs.” Not only should we aim to say helpful words, but we should choose words that build up the other person. And we can’t do that “according to their needs” unless we have listened to them, and understand their needs.

Lastly, it urges us to speak so “that it may benefit those who listen.” What is the benefit for the other person in what you are saying? If you have that thought in your head, you will come up with helpful, specific and kind words on a regular basis. Do you have a friend who does that for you? Someone who really listens to you and you can count on them to say encouraging words that are helpful and specific? Wouldn’t you like more of your co-workers and friends to speak that way when you are with them? I know I would!

Take the time right now to memorize or print out this one short statement, and start today to apply it each and every time you open your mouth to speak. You will find that the rewards for you will be “winning” more and better friends, and new increased influence when you have something to say!

As Featured On EzineArticles